I learned a lesson this weekend. I'm pretty sure I already knew it, but let's just say I re-learned it in a way that made me feel a little guilty, proud and very lucky...or maybe I should say blessed. Let me explain this to you.
On Saturday we had dinner guests. I will call this family The Y Family. Mr. Y was Taka's boss when he worked at the hotel. They are very close in age and became fast friends. We were invited to their wedding, and Kaito was asked to be the "flower boy" during their reception (Kousei wasn't born yet). They have since had 2 children and I've been teaching them since they each turned 2. They are now 8 and 6. When I got home from work Mrs. Y and her 8 year old daughter were already here helping Taka get dinner on the table. Mr. Y and his 6 years old son were at karate class and would get here in about 30 minutes. We had a very nice and comfortable dinner and were enjoying a very loud conversation telling stories to the kids about when they were babies and toddlers, when Mrs. Y asked me if I had any pictures of myself when I was younger. My immediate reaction was, "No. Not here with me." But Kaito jumped up to turn on the computer and Kousei jumped up to run upstairs to gather photo albums. We spent the next hour looking at pictures of Me.
This was very embarrassing and I really tried to steer them away from the albums as quickly as I could. But I could see that was not going to happen. And as I listened to some of their comments my feelings soon changed from shy to interested. They were very free with the comments...and enough compliments to really blow my head up 12 sizes if I were to believe everything they said. But there was one comment in particular that made me look at the entire situation in a whole new light. I want to share some of those comments with you now.
Now, I don't have a whole lot of pictures here from my before-Taka days but, here are a few of the pictures that they seemed to be most interested in and impressed by.
I'm almost embarrassed to post these pictures. I mean, really, look at me! HaHaHa! But the comments these pictures generated were just hilarious. First of all, as you can imagine, they were shocked that I once wore glasses. Then I heard, gawky, nerdy and so very different from what I look like now (thank goodness! LOL). But they were impressed that I played with my little brother and bigger sister (baby brother was in the hospital as having JUST been born)...and that my grandparents had so many grandchildren and we were all in the same place at the same time. The whole "loving family" thing was very impressive to the Y Family.
Both
Mr. and Mrs. Y were very interested in this picture. They wanted to
know how old I was. Where were we. Who is this boy and why were we
getting our picture taken together. So, I had to explain all about high
school dances. This is something that they do not have here in Japan. It
makes me so sad because some of my very very best memories are from
these dances. So, to answer their questions...I was a junior in high
school (16 years old). My boyfriend, Shon, and I were at the Sweetheart
Ball - in February. And everyone who went to any of these school dances
had the opportunity to get their picture taken as a couple, as a group
of couples, or as a group of friends. I have several dance pictures here
in Japan with me. The Y family really enjoyed looking at each picture
and they wanted to know the "story" behind each one. This one, in
particular, was interesting to them because Mrs. Y fell in love with my
dress. :-) I loved this dress, too. This dress belonged to my best
friend's mother. She wore it when she was in high school! I was singing
the theme song at the dance and I needed something extra special to
wear. This dress was perfect! And...after many many hours of searching, I
found the perfect pair of shoes to go with the dress. I called them my
"Dorothy shoes". Too bad you can't see them in this picture.
After learning about the school dances, Mrs. Y said, "I wish I could have grown up as a girl in America." I don't blame her, it was preatty neat.
This
picture was taken in 1998 and contrary to popular belief, Taka and I
had not started dating yet. The night before, Taka's band had played at a
dance party that my friends had put together. We had all stayed out WAY
too late and I found myself being woken up WAY too early in the
morning. The guys in the band had all come over to my place to re-hash
the night before. I guess the fact that they were all still in their
early 20s gave them a little bit more get-up-and-go than this 31 year
old had. They waited patiently for me to wake up and shower (not
necessarily in that order) and then they decided they wanted to go out.
We ended up at a shopping center that had a million of those instant
photo booths. We took turns and even tried to fit all 6 of us in at one
time. Then they each wanted a photo with me. I wish I still had the rest
of the pictures because we came up with some super funny poses. But
this picture, I think, is the best picture that Taka and I have ever
taken together. Mr. And Mrs. Y didn't have a comment to this
picture. They just, in turn, sat and stared at it. But their daughter
said: "I've never met anyone as pretty as this."
I
think this picture is self explanatory. This is me and my Daddy at Taka's and my
wedding reception in 2000. This picture isn't very good because I have
it in an album and I can't get it out to scan it without ruining the
entire page.
Mrs. Y's comment: "Your dad is so very cool!" Yes, I agree.
Mr.
Y's comment: "You can tell (in this series of photos) how proud you are
of your dad and how much you love him. It is my goal that my daughter
feels that way about me when we are at her wedding."
Then Mrs. Y
went on to tell me that she grew up without a father in the house. She
has never known the love of a father and wishes so badly that she had a
picture like this one. She told me how lucky I am to not only have had
my daddy there with me on that day, but to have a dad that I love and am
proud to walk with...and who so obviously was proud of me, too. Yes, I
truly am blessed.
And this is the picture that prompted the comment that made me feel like I need to write this post. In this picture I am 13 years old. This is graduation from jr high school. These are my friends. Some of the best friends I've ever had. And, yes, one was my first ever boyfriend. This picture was taken just a couple weeks before my family moved from California to Idaho. When I told Mr. and Mrs. Y the story behind this picture, Mrs. Y said that I shouldn't have been smiling...I should have been crying because it was a night of good-byes. I have never really thought of it like that. I guess I was just happy to be there with these great guys. Scotty, Richie, Jaime and Mike (and Martin who is not in the picture - where was he?) taught me a lot about friendship, loyalty and they even taught me how to spit (well, they tried anyway). They accepted me for exactly who I was. I never had to act fake or try to be something different. I said what was on my mind and they never held that against me. In the time we spent together I don't remember any of them ever getting mad at me...they may have, but I never noticed it :-) Leaving these guys made leaving California very very hard.
Now, for The Comment.....
Mrs. Y: "Look at the smile on your face. You were obviously very happy here. I was never, not one time, that happy when I was 13. In fact, I'm not even sure I have ever been that happy."
Now, we can take that as sad that the fact Mrs. Y feels she's never been happy, or we can take it as a super great compliment to the people in my life. And the latter is the way I've decided to take that comment.
And the lesson I learned this weekend?.....
I am very lucky. I have had family and friends in my life that have truly made it possible for me to grow up happy. I've had an excellent life so far. And I feel so very blessed to have each of these people in my life because each person that has become my friend - or is my family - has played a part in the person that I am right now. I am so lucky to have had a happy life. And, thank goodness, I still have super great people in my life who continue to make each and every day of my life a happy day. Whether they live in my house with me...or are so far that email is our only form of contact...I love each and every one of them. And I am thankful for the joy they bring into my life.
I am a happy girl....and that is what I re-learned.
Always Angie
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